My Top Ten of 2012: Call Me Uncle Travis in 2013

First I’d like to say some honorable mentions that didn’t quite make the top 10. There was the day the world didn’t end, but who really expected that to happen, the day congress declared pizza a vegetable which made my diet considerably more healthy, and the day I got hit by a car on my bike just to bounce off the car and on the cement a few times unharmed (not really a great day until considering I was completely fine). All in all it was a great year and a top 20 would have been easy but I didn’t have time for it.

So after everything happening this year here we are at #1. To me this was unexpected but always wanted and took the top spot as soon as I heard the news.

Sometime around June of 2013 I am going to be…….. AN UNCLE!!!

Excuse me to take a few moments of excitement here but it’s the most amazing, potential packed, exciting, loving, scary, nerve racking, thought provoking and inspiring thing which has happened to me in a long time. And I’m just the uncle. I can’t imagine how my brother Tyler and his wife Kerri are feeling.

It’s weird for me because I’m the youngest of three brothers and of all my cousins who were around growing up. I’ve never had someone to look at as younger. A person I am a close relative of to take care of, buy small clothes for, send a toy, teach something to, pick up in the air and give them the love you can give to a kid, or teen or young adult. But now I will. And I’m so pumped!

If things continue as they are I’m probably not going to live near him/her (him/her is also exciting to think about!!!). So I’ll be the uncle who lives in some place foreign to them who they get to go on a plane and fly and visit for a week to stay up late at his house and go on adventures with to be slightly or wholly irresponsible. I’ll get to the privilege to have fun with the kid and check in on life when them. Send them abstract gifts and clothes which don’t fit quite right or aren’t completely in style at the time (along with a check of course to make up for whatever shortcomings I may have in appropriate gift giving).

I think about my Uncle’s Eddy, Fred, Bob, Terry, and Randy. They were all sweet. Uncle Eddy is the crazy one always good for fun. Uncle Fred is a man I’ll always look up to as what a man should be in how he treated his wife and me and others. Uncle Bob is a solid family man established in his community. Uncle Terry, the one I looked up to the most as a child, is a strong and silent man except for the stories which he tells of being a pilot who in Vietnam, commercially and then privately. Uncle Randy is tall and quiet but always enthused and asking questions about my life. I like to think I’ll take the good of what I’ve seen of them and try to be that.

Whatever it is about it I’m overcome with it all. I’ll do whatever I can to be good once this kid comes along and it’ll be another reminder in my life to grow up to be someone worth visiting and having a relationship with on any level. So to my #1, niece or nephew, you’ve got one excited uncle (and another uncle and aunt and grandma and grandpa and many more) waiting for you. You don’t know it yet but you are already being celebrated and will know it from the second you come into the world.

I am guessing I already know my #1 of 2013 as well. See you in June.

Just adding a little Rieth to the family!

 

My Top Ten of 2012: #2 Weddings

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This was completely out of left field for me but early in 2012 my friend Addison called me because he was getting married and said he had something to talk to me about. I was thinking he was just going to see if I wanted to treck it out to Colorado for the wedding. There was more to it than the trip out there though. He asked if I would officiate his wedding for me. Like I said left field.

This was the first time in my life I was literally speechless. I sat on the phone before I could barely manage to get out “I don’t know… Can I even do that?”

It turns out I could do it. Addison had already done the research and in the next couple weeks we decided I would do it. And it actually happened. I wrote the whole ceremony out, got a suit, flew out to Colorado, and showed up. We practiced the ceremony but still I was nervous. It wasn’t until sitting with Addison the half hour before the wedding I calmed down for the both of us. My leg still shook almost the whole ceremony but the words came out, people even laughed at the joke I tried to make. Besides all that it was probably the most humbling thing ever to be asked to do. It was really a great privilege to be able to talk, in front of people who mattered to them, about Addison and Kali. At the end was the coolest part of getting to pronounce Addison and Kali Haynes; husband and wife. It really felt weird for me because I never expected to do it and because they thought I would do a good job.

It was interesting after as people came up and told me it was a beautiful ceremony. One guy even asked about how many weddings I do a year. I was worried I would be terrible at it but thankfully, hopefully, for Addison and Kali’s sake it was a good time.

Then about 3 weeks later when I had truly just started to de-stress from the wedding, bike trip and week at Young Life camp my friend Josh asked me to officiate his wedding. This was also un-expected. The second time around was easier because I had done it a first time already. The writing came easier and the day approached with less stress. The day of I showed up early to run through the ceremony a couple times and got soaked by a flash rainstorm as I sprinted back to my car. I ran through everything again while drying my hair with the vent fan on high in my car.

Eventually the rain died down and things went as planned. During the ceremony my leg didn’t even do the shaky leg thing it did at Addison and Kali’s wedding! I was happy again to tell a story of two people meeting, falling in love, about the engagement, about their faith and finally (I’m sure this never gets old for people who do a lot of weddings) pronounced another couple husband and wife. After the ceremony we took a group picture with both families and went to celebrate Josh and Molly Cooper.

Writing and performing the ceremony for these two couples was probably one of the more challenging things I did in 2012 (biking across 5 states was definitely easier) because I wanted everything to be perfect. I know it wasn’t perfect but I came to the conclusion sometime while working on Addison and Kali’s wedding I was just celebrating them. No matter how good or bad what I did was it had nothing on their love for each other. So I tried to look at it as trying to give a good gift. If it was good, they would like it, and if it wasn’t good they would still be just fine. I have to say though those two nights were the two happiest of my 2012.

My prayers, love, and best wishes to you, Mr. and Mrs. Haynes and Mr. and Mrs. Cooper, in 2013. Thank you.

My Top Ten of 2012: #3 Young Life

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These two were pretty easy picks for me. For the past 4 years Young Life has been something I do. Really it hasn’t been until this past year and a half where it really feels like a day without something to do with Young Life is an incomplete day. It’s been great to be a part of something which encourages earning the right to be heard through open and accepting relationships before anything else. I’ve gotten to go to go places and do a lot of amazing things through this great organization but above all am so glad I get to share in a growing friendship with a great YL team and great group of guys.

In other great news I learned Plainwell is getting Young Life. Plainwell is where I graduated from in 2006 and I’ve been hoping and praying Young Life would pop up there for a while now. It’ll be exciting to see Young Life get into the community and school there in 2013.

My Top Ten of 2012: #4 Biking from Michigan to Minnesota

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#4 Biking

This was one of the more adventurous things I’ve gotten to do in my life. The trip took seven days and I traveled a total of 785 miles. It all started in Holland and the first day was 164 mile route, with a detour through Gary, IN when I needed to get to a bike shop after popping three tubes and slashing a tire on the first day. In Chicago I got to stay with my friend Greg. That day I drank 8 32 oz Gatorades, 64 oz of water, had 3 snickers bars, a cliff bar, 3 packs of Gu, and once in Chicago ate 2 burritos from Chipotle and still lost weight. From there I stayed with a families I had never met in Janesville, Richland Center, and Fountain City.  I stayed with the Marshall’s in Richland Center and they treated me with the hospitality of a long lost brother. The mom made me eat my weight in food within the first hour and then we had dinner and after that the two Marshall daughters, Mckenzie and Alyssa, took me out for ice cream and a tour of the town.

The next day I got into Minneapolis late after a 130 mile day of bike problems, no cell phone service, hitchhiking and gut wrenching hills. It was nice to be done, as I rode past Target Field Justin Morneau hit a home run. I pretended it was all for me as the crowd went wild and fireworks shot up into the air from the scoreboard right above me. That night I stayed with my friends family and had some much needed food and fun. The next day was a little crazy. I thought it was going to be a normal short day. Only 99 miles to Little Falls, MN but when I got there the person I was supposed to stay with (he was an elderly man) never picked up his phone. So I ate at a bar and met a husband and wife who, without telling me, ended up paying for my meal on their way out. After the meal I went and saw a movie and since I still hadn’t heard back from the man started biking into the night. Around 30 miles later it was pitch black with enough light from my bike lamp to see the painted lines on the road. I was in the backroads in the backwoods of Minnesota when, about 50 yards off the road, I saw a light in the woods seeming bright than most. Turns out it was Sweet Water Lake Resort. I knocked on the lodge doors which were locked by the time I got there and was greeted by a nice old lady who gave me a 2 bedroom cabin on the lake for a mere $50 and then had the best sleep of my life. The next day I woke up and had a flat tire so I put a new one on. My pump broke when I was about half way done inflating the tire. I biked 20 miles to a gas station to fill up on air when I realized my back tire had 3 broken spokes. I didn’t care too much other than it made for a bumpier ride. 60 or so miles later I finished my journey at Castaway Club Young Life Camp in Detroit Lakes Minnesota. There was no one there to greet me, after all of the preparing I forgot to call ahead and let them know I’d be coming on bike. My Young Life guys were still an hour and a half away when I got to the camp so I went for a swim in the lake and laid in the grass before they got there.

The whole idea started when I heard some kids needed help with funding to go to Young Life camp. Total they needed $8,000. Through the help and generosity of others we raised $3,000 for those kids and they were able to go to camp, we also raised another $1,000 to help kids in Holland Michigan go to camp. It meant the world to me to be a part of something good happening. Since the whole thing ended I’ve just had the lingering thought of what if’s about getting in better shape, going longer distances, more days and the possibility of doing more to make sure kids are provided for. We’ll see what 2013 and beyond have in store.

My Top Ten of 2012: #6 West Virginia and #5 Greek Life Arc Project Surf Trip

#6 West Virginia and #5 Greek Life Arc Project Surf Trip

These two go together (kind of) and are possibly the two most exciting things of my top ten. I consider myself lucky and blessed and trusted entirely too much to have had these experiences. A little bit before this time last year Hope College’s chaplain asked my friend Jay and I if we would be interested in taking a bunch of Fraternity guys on a mission trip to Florida. It was a mission trip but I feel guilty calling it that because it more so had the feeling of vacation. Every morning we woke up early and headed to Jacksonville where we fixed up a day center kids from local schools hung out at after school and all day during the summer. We painted, shoveled, laid cement, raked, painted some more, moved and constructed with the efficiency of 21 young men. They came up with more work for us to do after we completed everything they wanted us to on the first day. Every afternoon we’d pack up, grab a quick lunch and head to the beach to give surfing our best try. At the end of the week we hosted a day long surf camp for the kids from the day center and then celebrated with them pizza party style in a nearby park.

Then this fall Jay and I got another call, seeing if we’d be interested in taking another group of Greeks to West Virginia on a whitewater rafting trip. Jay and I, being the willing individuals we are, eagerly agreed. It was another amazing trip but quicker this time. We only had four days to drive down, hike for a day, go white water rafting the next day and then drive back.

The trips are amazing. It’s just a bunch of guys from separate Fraternities who don’t really know each other hanging out, eating, hiking, serving, surfing, trying not to die on a river and trying new things together. The whole point of the trips is to create unity and community among these guys. It’s been fun to see it work. It’s easy for the people to critique each other, downplay the good they have to offer and fight, but it’s much harder to create. These trips have created something good among the Greek at Hope. I’m real glad to have been able to be a part of it all.

The trips were a great part of 2012… Now I’m excited as surf trip 2013 is in the works and we’ll be back in Florida in a few short months.

Surf Trip!

Fall Break!

My Top Ten of 2012: #7 Camp Rock

#7 Camp Rock

I met with Todd, the head of Camp Rock, and we talked it through. They had a need and things at the Rescue Mission weren’t moving along as planned. A day after our meeting I agreed to shift my responsibilities and money raised to work at Camp Rock for the summer. The last thing to talk over was which group of kids to work with. Todd gave me the opportunity to have a voice in where I would go.  I pointed out my experience being mainly with high schoolers and some middle school but told him I would go where he needed me. Come to find out they had enough staff to help out with the high schoolers (there were usually only 15 or so who showed up). The middle schoolers were pretty set as were the 3rd-5th graders. I put my best face to prove I was a cool go with the flow type of guy but really I knew what it meant.

Kindergarten-2nd grade.

As a younger twenty year old guy I wouldn’t have described myself as a kid person. I’d never had a little sibling or neighbor or anything. I felt completely incapable. I was nervous. My plans, as they often do, were completely flipped around. The summer was planned to be spent focusing on community development with churches, rehabilitation programs and helping grown men find jobs. Instead I was with toddlers on playgrounds, going on field trips, laying around in the shade of trees on sunny days or sitting next to an old fan watching Madagascar and explaining questions about what the penguins were doing. I was worried they wouldn’t like me or I wouldn’t be fun for them or wouldn’t be able to calm them down when they started crying in big hyperventilating gasps. Without much of a transition case management was traded in for bear hunts in the woods and job training for lifting tiny bodies into the sky like airplanes. Summer turned into time spent with little kids who have weird little lives. They are entirely confused and ask when lunch is about a thousand times a day. Their hands, which they are always insisting you hold on to tightly, are always sweaty, they tell you when they are about to pee their pants and we run to the bathroom. They would rather feel your muscles or be picked up and spun around over and over than have anything else the world has to offer. Someone is always needing a hug or a hand to hold when walking places, they are scared of weird things and need someone to console them when they are afraid. To cup their tiny bodies up in arms and whisper little words in little ears how everything is going to be okay and make them feel protected.

#7 was a change of plans I am very glad for. It was a great way to learn something about myself, and little the little kids I learned I have a heart for, and what I’m capable of. Giving little kids attention and love they need. Learning each and every one is a special little being and is worth treating so.

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My Top Ten of 2012: #8 Colorado

#8 Colorado

It’s hard for me to have Colorado rank all the way down at #8. Previous years in life it has always been a top three or four. This year it sits at 8. Not because Colorado has become any less excellent at all it just speaks volumes to the top 7 I guess. My first visit out to Colorado as a Junior in high school felt like a homecoming as has every visit ever since. The feeling of going back, breathing the thin air, staring up at the giant mountains, snowboarding and tucking away in a small warm room at the end of the day has never changed. The route from Colorado Springs to Denver to Breckenridge  is still second nature to me. Drop me off at any section of the road and I could tell you where I am, how far it is Denver or how long it would take, time to put my boots on included, till we could be standing on the top of peak 8 (given traffic and lift lines weren’t backed up).

Visiting Colorado twice this year was enough… but barely. The first time was fun. It was a rather impromptu visit spurred by a few traded shifts to get off work and an old friend who agreed to drive out with me. We stopped at a bookstore in Chicago, ate bags of trail-mix and granola, drove through the night and listened to all of the music our friends gave us before finally getting to Colorado. We went to Colorado Springs for a day visit with my friends from the Dale House before heading a few hours more northwest. We got to Keystone and I said goodbye to my friend. She went on to Vail for a couple days then California then Oregon and then Nepal I believe. I spent a few days skiing with friends then went back to Denver to celebrate a friends birthday, and took a bus to Colorado Springs for a couple days visit before flying back to Michigan.

I remember the first time visiting and know the feeling I’ll get with every visit back. Colorado is the old friend I feel I’ve had forever, always on my side and good to catch up with like a day hasn’t passed from the last visit. It’s the way the bed you grew up in at home sleeps a little better than any other, this is the way Colorado lives for me. The state understands me well, gives me what I need and what I hope for and the things I need to know in the way I need to know them. It’s odd for a place to speak into a person like this but it does. It’s a blessing to have found Colorado and to be able to visit it as much as I do.

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My Top Ten Things of 2012: #10 Public Speaking #9 Coaching Lacrosse

Recently I logged onto Facebook and noticed something on the top of my page. It was a recap of my top 20 events from 2012.

“Cool” I thought to myself looking forward to seeing all the great events from the past year. I was surprised to learn I made 161 new friends which is an average of one new friend/2.26 days or every 54 hours and 15 minutes (quick math… didn’t spend any time on that at all). Then there was the picture I put up that a lot of people liked, facebook added a cover photo and even though I didn’t take it people really like my current one so that made the top 20 too.

Overall I have to give Facebook some credit. It pegged a few of my favorite memories from 2012 but the system of likes, shares and comments didn’t catch all of them. So I’ve decided to do a little series to give justice to my personal top ten favorite things of 2012.

So here we go!

#10 Public Speaking

Back in March I got to speak to a group of social workers at Grand Valley State.

I don’t have a picture for this one BUT they had a handout with “Guest Speaker: Travis Reith” on it and everything. They spelled my name wrong but that’s ok. Everyone spells my name wrong and I’ve thought about getting the “ie” in my last name changed to “ei” just so people don’t have to worry about misspelling it anymore.

Anyways I was privileged to go in and talk about my experience with homeless people in Denver. It was the first time I was able to speak about it publicly and I had so much fun. Speaking in front of people is not really hard for me. I still get nervous and my leg shakes and mouth gets dry but the part which is still hard for me is to wrap my mind around is that people are listening. The fact people would actually want to hear anything I say (or read it…. thanks to all of you who do) kind of astounds me. So it was real humbling to say the least. I loved talking to a group of people so passionate about helping.

I wrote a post about it including this thank you to social workers everywhere (You can read the whole thing here)

So glad to have that opportunity. Wouldn’t mind having more like it in the future.

#9 Coaching Lacrosse

Playing together at Hope before coaching together two seasons later.

At the beginning of 2012 my friend and former teammate Andy asked me to coach a lacrosse team with him. A few months later and I was standing on the sidelines as the assistant varsity coach the 2nd ranked team in the state. The guys were great and coaching with Andy was a ton of fun. On the last day of tryouts we lost one of our best players to a broken ankle. He stuck it out with the team the whole season and we ended with a record of 13-5 which was the best in school history (also brings my cumulative coaching record to 37-7… not bad). I have to admit I probably had too much fun at practice, was too serious sometimes and joked around too much at other times. It was just fun for me. Luckily I just got done meeting with the athletic director about the coming season. Can’t wait for it to begin!

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Making the write move

This past year has been quite a busy one. I think I’ll get into that more later but one thing is for sure. Things have changed. Life moved fast this year. I’m still in Michigan but have spent at least a week in Colorado, Florida, West Virginia, Pennsylvania and Minnesota along with traveling all over in-between.

I’ve been working enough part time jobs as to allow life to be a full time adventure. It keeps me busy. I’m still working at a running company and most recently took on life as a substitute teacher (#subs) which has been so much fun. Young Life has continued to be a blessing to me as I am now an “adult leader” and get some new opportunities of things I can do. We just had our Christmas party at Special Education Ministries which I almost quit but couldn’t bring myself to. I’ll be getting into full swing for planning of the Hope Greek Life Fraternity Mission Trip with Arc Ministries to Florida. Along with spring comes lacrosse season. We still don’t have a head coach and I talked with the athletic director about taking the position. Truth is I don’t feel prepared enough to take it on. So I’m just hoping we get a head coach I get along with well as I stay in the assistant position.

All of this makes me feel like the middle section of a Venn diagram. Truth is I love it. Grabbing so many parts of life together is a lot of fun for me. While it doesn’t come many securities we look for in life it does come with benefits of fun, adventure, relationships and a joy I wouldn’t get otherwise.

In it all I’ve kept writing about my time in Denver with homeless people. I’ve not been stuck on it but I must say it’s been a great experience. It is hard to stay focused on it with everything in life moving by so fast. It’s partially why I haven’t written so much here for a while but I have fallen more and more in love with writing.

Recently I’ve rededicated myself to it. I even transformed my bedroom to be more conducive to writing. I now have a desk and bookshelf taking up most of my room. It makes getting up early before work or staying up a little later at night a little more do-able. Papers, edits, reminders and notes hang all over my walls. I keep pictures of my Dale House kids above my desk to remind me of why I do all I do. Next to the kids a poster of a night time cityscape reminds me of the nights spent in Denver. A few more of my favorite photo’s and quotes stare back at me when I write. It all keeps me motivated which I need. Because I really do believe in what I’m doing and feel it’s important.

Like anyone else I’m figuring things out. It’s funny sometimes how we figure things out. This past summer I officiated two weddings which I thought was a funny thing for a single 24 year old to do but I learned a lot about love. I also learned you don’t need to be an expert on everything to do a good job. Most of the time it just takes effort, optimism and undying dedication. Put yourself in a situation to make it work. Want whatever it is you want bad enough and it will happen. For me it’s been this book. For my friends it’s been marriage, going to Africa or Australia, going back to school or staying and working at the Dale House.

Over everything this past year I’ve seen how we are all writing our story. I’ve seen a couple friends stories come to an end. They were two really lively guys. It’s sad but it reminds me to keep my story going. Live adventurously. As we are the author of our own story we need to remember it’s not always about making the right move as it is just making the write move. Find something you love and go for it. Don’t plan it so much. Risk it. Life will likely be a little more like poetry which sweeps in and out of seasons than a science book’s presentation of what is and isn’t. Be fine not managing everything. Just keep going.

Can’t wait to keep the write moving. Best to you in yours.

Trav