Final: 785 miles, $3,450 raised for kids to go to Young Life Camp and not a single bear.

It was just over a month ago when I was biking across Michigan, Indiana, Illinois, Wisconsin and Minnesota. The purpose was to raise money for kids from the Dale House Project and from the greater Holland area to go to Young Life camp. I had never done anything like this before. Most days were well over 100 miles and at night I spent time with families I had never met before. The month before had been full of training and fundraising.

The second day of the trip pretty much summed up what the whole experience was like. The first day had plenty of setbacks and turned out to be 164 miles. The second day consisted of a headwind of 15-18 mhp for most of the 100 miles. Headwinds frustrate me more than hills or heat or rain. A good strong headwind feels like pressing equally on the break and gas pedals in a car. Maximum effort with minimal results. That day my legs hurt, I powered through, I yelled going up hills with the wind blowing strong in my face. I pushed as hard as I could only to see the speed on my computer dropping consistently. I dropped my wallet and had to back track. Finally I started praying for the wind to just ease up a bit.

Every time I finished a prayer the wind seemed to pick up, almost mocking me, and putting more resistance on every pedal. Finally that day I snapped. I was sick of the wind, sick of praying and biked harder than I think I ever had. I’m sure my jaw was clenched as I pushed and pushed as if to defy the wind. To overcome everything.

This is what I mean everything was like. Instead of making life easier by giving me what I wanted it was kind of like God may have just been saying. “Stop it. Stop asking for things to be easy. Stop being a wimp”

I felt that in the last leg of the day tuesday. When God seemed to maybe say “You think you’re in shape, you think you know how to push yourself, you think you know strength in weakness but Travis, you don’t know how I’ve made you. You don’t know how amazingly well I made you. You don’t know really what you can do but I can show you and teach you through testing. Maybe if you stopped asking for it to be so easy all the time you might even see”

After everything shook out and the trip was done I didn’t feel much sense of accomplishment but more so wonder of what I might be able to do. The trip was very hard at times but I know I could have tacked on another 20 or 40 miles onto most days. The trip could have been 1,000 miles and it still would have happened. And after the next trip I’m sure I’ll still have the same sense of curiosity.

But for now I can say it is good. Roughly $3,450 was raised. Around $2,500 will go to the DHP and $1,000 will stay here in holland to send kids to camp.

Thanks everyone for all the support, encouragement, and help. And no James Sa, there was not a single bear fight/attack/sighting/non-confrontational gathering.

Book Review: The Other Wes Moore

“Two kids with the same name living in the same decaying city. One grew up to be a Rhodes Scholar, decorated combat veteran, White House Fellow, and business leader. The other is serving a life sentence in prison for felony murder”

I just finished this book today and it resonates so much with what I have seen and lived in the past two years. The story, as stated above, is about two guys around the same age, both fatherless, from the same hood, with an eery amount of similarities growing up but an ever more profound difference of where they are now.

The whole story ends up begging one question of the ways the two men turned out.

How?

Where is the promise of hope and a future? How did one kid get out, become a hero and a leader while the other fell into the victim of circumstances a detriment to society and a villain? It’s a sad and scary story highlighting many of the troubles of youth in America.

I loved Wes’ accurate and humble portrayal of his own life, mistakes and grace given to him while recognizing the same of his friend and counterpart of the story. In the end there are no real answers but a lot of questions worth thinking about to be applied to ourselves and others. To be honest it’s a book I’ve lost some sleep over but I’m glad because it’s been so important to think about my personal decisions and how I approach life but also how I give grace to others like me. How the murderer’s in jail are like me or you or your friend. It made me appreciate my freedom and grieve others entrapment to a life they never viewed as something long term. It challenges the cocky attitude I have sometimes; being proud of where I am rather than grateful of where I am not. Wes states it well when he says “The chilling truth is that his story could have been mine. The tragedy is that my story could have been his”.

Unlike many books I have read and appreciated (Love Wins, Irresistible Revolution, Crazy Love) this books digs into something more intimate than attempts at answers and walks through the real lives of families and individuals. If you are involved social work, teaching, Young Life, race issues, psychology or want a lesson in empathy I highly recommend this book. It’s also just an all around good true story.

I must say it was one of my favorite reads over the past year. A book I’m sure to revisit.

Check out Wes’ website here for more information.

A year ago today.

Right now in 2012 I’m coming off one of the busiest months of my life (officiated my first wedding, biked 785 miles to raise money for kids to go to summer camp, spent a week at a Young Life camp, started a new job, still working my old job and a few other things) and things don’t look like they will slow down as I hoped. It stresses me out sometimes. This morning I decided to read my journal from a year ago because a year ago I was part way through my time living on the streets in Denver. It was good to see how I am fine now and read my own words of assurance from a year ago.

Here is July 5th 2011.

I really wish I had some food right now. Today I’ve had a small cup of soup, half a peach, a slice of bread, cookie and some crackers. I gave away the sandwiches, cookies, corn chips and everything I had in my bag. All in all it was about enough food for one person for a day to be full. I was able to share it with two others who may or may not have needed it more than me. I can give more than I am comfortable giving thought because I know I’ll be sustained. I don’t know when where or how just that I will be.

When I gave today I was not in the mood to do so. It didn’t even feel good, it felt right but not good, which made me realize that doing what is right is necessary even when the novelty of doing so is lost. That is how we bring others closer to having what we have. I share when I have only enough to feed one, with three, so that we share in what I have but we may also share in hunger. By sharing everything and them knowing I want them to have what I have I hope they can realize my faith. My confidence in giving. Why I love and see them as important. So maybe then I can share, someday, my faith with them so that they can, again, have what I have. What I want to share with them the most.

After writing it out I know that doing good doesn’t always feel good because it often defies human nature (especially when it comes to basic needs) Even now I am still hungry from not eating, tired from walking 5 or so miles to try to get food only to have the place be closed, and a little anxious wondering how I’ll sleep tonight hungry and possibly through another thunder storm. But I do feel pleased, I feel pretty right with God, I know I didn’t give with the most grateful heart today but I still gave and tried to be nice and grateful while giving. I guess that’s why we practice like this so we can do it better next time.

Thought it all I have confident assurance in God I’ll be taken care of. I notice that when I write or say I am anxious during my time out here on the streets I’m actually not feeling that way but feel as though I should feel that ay. Kind of like saying “I have no food and can’t see any coming. I have no roof and it’s raining… I should be worried… right? But instead I’m just filled with thanks for what I have had and a mentality that says “eh, oh well. Keep on giving. I’ll be ok” ANd I should feel that way because that’s the faith I have come to know. That is what I have experiences out here to an amazing degree with being provided for and finding out how much easier I am sustained by things than I thought I would be.

Sometimes I’m tired but give more regardless and other times I’m ready to give but find rest instead. Either way I know I’ll be good and life will take care of itself